Psychologist Giorgio Nardone, published today in Spain his book: ' women errors in love', which analyzes the scripts or profiles 17 who plays the female relations as well as a couple themselves.
According to Giorgio Nardone all women play roles, but are repeated notice, either in response to failure or a successful relationship. errors women in love Nardone is the proposed editorial work now opens in Spain, a book that makes an exercise of observation from outside. He said the male perspective is ideal for analyzing the dynamics synthesized in 17 scenarios or profiles ranging from Sleeping Beauty or The Amazon, the Seductive, The Executive or Witch . All of them, misused, have the same fate: failure. The psychologist answered questions English newspaper LaVanguardia.es .
Q uestions and answers -Ha titualdo the book The errors of women in love. "They make more mistakes women than men in love or is that more applicants?
- (smiles). I defined the mistakes of women as wrong script, that is, ways of relating with the opposite sex so rigid and stagnant. The scripts are not wrong in themselves, but make errors when they become a form of relationship. Moreover, the fact that
sentimental woman using a script is because he has experienced success throughout his life. For example, I have defined as the overflowing is a beautiful woman who is successful in professional life, which is very positive, but this script successfully transferred to the realm of the couple. So it is with men who are weaker than her, until finally gets tired and leaves. What I mean is that the error is not a decision error or attitude, but it is hard to repeat a script that works in some areas of life but loses functionality when something becomes stagnant. -surprising that a man is the need to set these scripts wrong women. Why do you think is the man who can describe it better?
"I saw it with my students or my colleagues. In most cases women are beautiful, successful, but you see that they try to make a speech related to the themes of love and the couple are completely lost. Do not know how to make a rational and consented. The brutal and primitive view of man is a pragmatic view that allows women to have that perspective alone will not succeed themselves have. As they are stuck in this system are the ability to look out and analyzed.
-claims in the book that women have more power than men. What was the turning point?
"Yes, yes, today's woman is more powerful than man . From the 70's feminism was a cultural evolution that women acquired a role that did not have before. There are areas where most professionals are women, in the case of the publishing world or culture. This has caused women to become more capable of managing all the dynamics of the relationship. Also I must say that in the modern family man is much more protected than women, and the result is a weak man and a woman more powerful. This has a clear impact on family dynamics.
- The man with fair play has accepted this new role of women?
"Yes, because there are many men who feel unable to assume certain responsibilities and are happy to delegate these responsibilities to women, as they once did with his mother or his family.
- Can you define what you mean by a hyphen sentimental?
"It's a mode that is established with your partner and that is the result of a course of action you've seen that has been successful throughout your life. It is a gift of nature, is something you build throughout life.
-Define a total of 17 scripts or sentimental roles and most of them as names of stories or characters taken from the literature. What do you mean by those labels?
"Yes, because in the stories or myths have some pictures that are part of the cultural, for example, Fairy, Sleeping Beauty, which searches for the prince. These metaphors help us to understand everything more easily. There are also scripts that I have given the more modern names The Executive or the overwhelming is not the world of myth, but the current social environment. Are all analog images that refer directly to a style. If I talk about a woman executive is clear that I am talking about a woman who has everything under control.
- Do you think there may be some women do not feel identified with any of the 17 patterns is proposed?
- Yes, it can happen, women would be feel identified with more than a dash, and this would be true health, flexibility. Every woman, as every man has a fundamental property, so they have difficulty in recognizing in a script, and make him the right questions, come to be recognized in his script fundamental. As I said in the descriptions of each script, and to get out of the traps, she would have to know what your script and make it more flexible, choosing features similar scripts. Some women do spontaneously, and those are the best.
"I understand that it would be a mistake to try to change drastically pre-established script ...
"Yes, every development offers the same power in the opposite direction, especially in the personality of a person. So the change has to be done by introducing elements drawn from other scripts. I insist that there is a script that is sick, become ill when it becomes rigid and unchanging.
- What do you think is the sentimental script most often repeated in modern society?
"Surely that of the overwhelming because it deals with those women who have successfully they are capable and that they can also relate very well so they are highly sought after and desired by men. The second would Executive Women , both are the most repeated today.
- Do you agree with what they have been rising in recent years and there is a pattern that stands out in this regard?
"Yes, and perhaps add a third would be to The Helmsman, who also is a hyphen perfectly complementary with the fact that we have a very weak man. The helmsman would be helping your partner, so much to do things in place. This is also your partner get a good position. And then there is a stroke of great concern, which is the modern Penelope .
- Why worry?
"Because it's one of the worst and having negative consequences. Corresponds to those women over 20 years in a relationship with a man who already has another family, and hope and wish that he leave his family and be with her forever. But it is something that will never happen, because while she is there waiting for him is simply a complementary relationship the other relationship you have.
- A man never leaves his family to go with his Penelope?
"Hardly, it is very rare. And when is it going to stop doing Penelope Penelope. (Smiles).
- Are we faithless by nature? I say this because most of the scripts that exposes is a member of the couple who succumb to an affair ...
"In the last part of the book I talk about love wise, and if you make a careful study you will see that love wise does not exist. If you look at nature, animals or men, know that the vast majority do not get to be faithful. There is a minority that does not so much loyalty, but keep a couple that works well. Both in animals and in us there are other features of this love that is maintained over time, talk about a happy love, I'm not talking about feeling obligated to be faithful. See that those who are still together is because they follow Flirting life. The animals that are monogamous love in each season each year around the recurring role of courtship as if for the first time. The key is to build a sense of complicity and always be allied with a partner. The hardest thing to get it and the exclusivity of the relationship. The metaphorical image I use is two tightrope walkers who walk on two different strings but has a single bar that must be managed together to maintain balance and not fall.
Let's talk about men. Which of the 17 scripts sentimental thought to prefer them in their opposite sex?
"It's hard, depends on each man and his experience, there are men who love the fairy, other Sleeping Beauty, and there are also men who love The Amazon . If we use a social setting that is not relational, and passing the 17 scripts like frames, the most wanted and desired is the fairy, but just looking at it (laughs). It's beautiful, sweet and beautiful and haunting you, but in reality after the man was just falling for all the others, because the attraction goes through complementarity.
"Just as described 17 parameters for women, do you think men can be classified into sentimental script?
- Yes, but are much simpler, there are only five.
"Well, only five, yes, we really looks very simple ...
- El Macho, the intellectual, the" no balls ", the Pygmalion (which increases than women of the myth of Pygmalion) and the latter would Adventurous, seduces you, grabs you, and then leaves. is the scoundrel, but that women love .
-says in the book that if the female perception lives on a daily basis in man wakes transgressive attitudes. Is it a maxim that is always true?
"Yes because when a man is so spoiled by a woman, as the case may be the helmsman, or kissing frogs, when cures are successful and they do grow big change, and then no longer complementary it. That's when he finds another that if it ceases to be complementary and need a woman who protects and will be looking for a woman who encourages, entices him.
- Do you understand that there may be someone accused of sexist women through classified by categories and stereotypes? "Since the book came out in Italy has been on the list of best sellers for many weeks and nobody has accused me of being sexist. I think if you read the book you will see that those who go wrong are unemployed men (laughs). The image I of man is a worthless man, without force, are balls go.
(source: LaVanguardia.es )
